1. |
Music For Night People
00:44
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2. |
Another Night
03:55
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[Verse 1]
The last call for some ethanol
Went unheeded, my feet are directed at the dark
Alleys of my city, past the blind pigs
Both of whom are serving and found at the free nerve ends
Which means they're both proximal to pain
A mind altering drug that's hard to abstain from
You can see the after effects in bared tears
And the hasty clicking sounds heels make on the cobblestone streets
A door slams, then the tires screech
With a telling limp, another woman leaves
In far skimpier clothes, than befitting for the weather
My guess is you can put the pieces together
As I pass by the closed mall and bums that keep asking for change
Despite the fact their paper cups are chock full
I see children past curfew, dealers make rounds
Rotisseries in kebab shops, drama abound
On the turf that I call my home
The birds are chirping, must be early morn' - Lunar perigee
In effect as I gaze at the skies and the smell of
Baked goods wafts through the air as sewer grates sigh
Streets wet from the rain, hearing clippers go through
Chains on a bike, it's a rather common sight
Get home, gotta lay my tired self down to sleep
Let my body recharge the cells for another day
[Verse 2]
Sauce on simmer, dropping cubes in the wok
Warm bodies cuddled up, tuned in to rock
Longjing on the tealights, there's magic in the air
Dim the lamps, I want you near to me, hours later
It's getting dark, but the streets come alive
I get dressed, go outside, the block is lit up
By blue beacons and car lights, ambulances and cops
Surrounding the scene, bystanders discussing
A bar fight that escalated when them cats tossed bottles
And one of them drew an Austrian model G29
Muzzle flash went off like a strobe light
Everybody probably thinking "I hope ain't noone I know died"
But the point of the matter is, despite the foreign
Influx of students and artists, there's still crime gatherings
And spots with the milk glass windows, they get it in
So arguments turn to homicides, seen it since a little kid
[Verse 3]
Came from the ballgame, headed to the lounge
A ska band performs in the streets, about a 100
People standing around, some dance, some vibe to it
Some drop coins in the hat after they through
Graf artists rappel down from the Oberbaum Bridge
Tagging the arch, the yellow fists are seen everywhere you walk
Profanity is just a part of our talk
But if you ask a man directions, he will answer for sure
Order black tea with peppermint, representing, you know
Tobacco in the apple head, bumping Julie Boutros
You gotta have a lady with you, if you're upstairs
And we're in company that's fair, tell'em squares
They can't fit inside the circle, or let'em figure it out by themselves
All we want is good times and fine health
Good conversation with some girls that's witty
Livin' The Life, it's just another night in Berlin City
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3. |
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[Verse 1 - Cedric Till]
Most days there's just too much to say
And yet not enough reasons to speak, you know that gaze
When ten years back seems like another life
And you can't even remember what you looked like
Feels like you've been here forever
All you recall are the remnants of pain and pleasure
The revolving door of friendship
Or whatever passes for that, these days, ephemeral phases
A general malaise sets in
When people once tight with you ain't checking in
Lives become too parallel to ever meet
A sour note at the end of the melody
Resentments, indifference and c'est la vies
Sharing pics of vacations or enough kicks to outfit a centipede
Thinking they stay in touch with a press of a button
Another name under a testament of what?
[Hook - Dana Shanti]
Tracks of time, always stand still
Train of life, it's moving
Driven by, a kind of force
Forward to, places we don't know...
[Verse 2 - Cedric Till]
Promises unkept, perhaps meant sincerely
In the moments that we uttered them, in theory
And practice, it's all so human
Regrets of a scarred soul, trying to rise from the charcoal
Of burning hearts we've all known, and left behind
In the solitude of sorrow, we were blinded
By our own egos in misalignment
As we grow into refinement, with time spent
Fighting entropy, or adding on to it
Feeling centered, at peace; or in a storm, ruined
In a manner we speak how we respond to it
Either as a catalyst or a conduit
Questions are the soil for growth, and yet
They can't provide the closure that we require
The answers teach us in a way we don't expect
And I know, necessity is not a neighbor to desire...
[Verse 3 - Cedric Till]
No guarantees that your actions are met with gratitude
Here we go again, dusting off platitudes
Sarcasm put aside, this is what I'm asking you
Which cycle is vicious and which is merely natural?
Everything I gave, I don't want it back
You can bet it's hard enough to forfeit all your regrets
Memories held in honor that I wanna forget
Pain is pointless if there is not a lesson to be learned left
Guess the sparks we hold onto just gonna fade
So when I meet new people, I play the tsundere
It ain't about who's gonna pay, more about
The residue of doubt, can't deal, so we do without
Keep taking, no commitment wanted nor needed
No reason not to be a hedonist, either, I guess
Sign of the times, evolve or starve
Or, just die as a cynic tomorrow, while everybody just...
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4. |
Keeping It Fresh
03:41
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[Verse 1]
Never belonged, never fit in
Case study of an unwilling rebel since I was ten
The more I follow the game, the more I'm feeling resentful
And only doing records with those I'm making sense to
They say they're finding profundity in the simple
Meritless tough talk over clunky instrumentals
Talking of whores, inane are the rhymes
When they say times change, who was changing the times?
I walk the city in plain clothes, deflect eyes
But freeze a crowd with a mic in hand, I wreck live
The gaze is scanning the room and I dissect guys
I can tell the hand of a man just by his bet size
A modern mind with an old school demeanor
A man first, yet I don't have to show you the penis
Cause this ain't no debate between Republicans
Until you find some dirt on my name, you say you're not convinced
But that's just common sense, I'm more into the rare sense
In it for the long haul; back tees, rear pins
And I don't argue with you daffodils
You'd build a better resumÈ if you had the skills
And Erik Jackson's still...
[Verse 2]
Soft words turn to shots when bare minimum's gone
Freedom of choice clearly shows the Merovingian's wrong
Give a man privileges without instilling discipline
You will see how fast the savage's coming out of a gentleman
In response, treacherous thoughts fester, a coarse gesture
Was made, time to put some wet work before pleasure
I kept it civil for years, no confrontations
Remembering taunts verbatim, still chose to let it slide
Retreated to the dark, where noone's challenging pride
By my return, they just forgot who I was, I didn't mind
Time flies and eradicates bonds left unattended
Folks haven't heard me rhyme, but my bars haven't diminished
That's the thing, they don't see you, then they don't believe you
Yeah, we both got a voice, but our hearts just aren't equal
On my tenth project out, and my blade remains sharpened
I build a web spanning the globe to stay sovereign
And that's why Conca's been...
[Verse 3]
How true is, the fact we're born altruists?
When all we consider is money when the mouth's moving
We're still slaves to an illusion, we trade in delusions
On scales growing in size with age, problems persist
Technology has us talking about how times have changed
When kids quit on education to be lottery picks
What states spend on education is a mockery when
We factor in what they spend on killing opposite twins
Often caught in between, extremes, and it seems
People weren't happy when I wouldn't hop off the fence
Been the Devil's advocate for the longest, they try to
Find my weak spot, I'll just reinforce wherever I'm strongest
So you'll attack there cause that's a crucial flaw in your logic
But back to the point, if all it takes is cash to annoint
Any given man or woman, you do understand
You base your livelihood on the money you put in their hands
And there's a really fat chance they'll be...
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5. |
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[Verse 1]
Years have gone, so have friends
Feet, walking on their own, and the road won't end
Soles are worn out and joints are sore
Burden on the back, but you're counted on
Don't wanna write, but your heart is aching
To release the pressure, check the valve
A thin membrane between you and the truth
As the world thinks you strong cause you cracked a smile
Look at your life, the absurdity
What could you really say with certainty?
"I don't know", and that is true
Like hardly coincides with your have-to-dos
Everybody showing their collectibles
As you wonder what it is you've left to lose
Can't grow anymore, you untangle the roots
When the where doesn't matter, but you have to move
You are now qualified to make new mistakes
There is your entitlement, choose your fate
Were it that easy, would you choose to wait?
Were it that hard, would you choose to chase?
In spite of other people with abusive traits
Even though you don't see a lot of use in the race
What is it about? Can you even see the angles?
Do you recognize any judges on the panel?
What if the endgame is all a pretend game?
To make sense of it, all attempts are in vain
You chase happiness or you're chasing meaning
You look for an escape or you face your demons
Most are self-made, results of self-hate
Life beat you down one time too many
But you probably got back up a time too few
Because chances to get it right this time, you got plenty
[Verse 2]
Some have the most, but they still doubt
Some have the least, but they still believe
Some give love without worrying about
What they might receive, they're just flying free
You can't avert your eyes, when you try to see ahead
Squint if you dare, it could be gone in a flash
Truthfully spoken, we miss out on most things
Probably it's best to enjoy what you have
The rocks in your path, turn to pebbles when you travel
And you're thrown off the saddle by the trouble afoot
Soon you'll recognize your mind is your best weapon
The high horse you came in on, now is a Shetland
We can only visualize what is destined
And do what it takes to get there
You trade in your worst traits for better ones
Otherwise what you want for will never come
Most of us are too hard on self
Me included, the pressure that I put on my back
To be great, and the lack of room
For error I allow myself is very deeply rooted
Looking for a sign just to read it like a blind man
Many people got tired of trying
Sought openings to others, and closure to self
No wonder that it's love that I struggle to find
I can't be a stoic, all I do is emotive
Can't see what I'm offered, the visor's lowered
Not a fan of PDA but I am devoted
But how to tell? Reluctant to touch
And words convey meaning, just not as much
One half is patient, one half is rushed
Stubbornly I'm holding the reins on my passion but
I feel like I gotta learn to trust, again...
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6. |
Letting Go
04:19
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[Verse 1]
Waking up to yet another day at work
Thinking of traveling, hours won't pass
And the tedium of it all, claws away at your nerves
Carrying the stress back home and then reverse
How often have you sat there wondering what it's worth?
The fridge needs filling, you watch liars on TV
Make a killing, while telling you what you don't deserve
Insecurities are reinforced, by seeing cars
And the many allures of all the rich people's perks
And envy becomes your motivator, looking down
Upon others who don't share your views, you go and get the paper
Consequences are dealt with later, you call it moving on
The cycle repeats, former close people now wanna be
In your position with their hands out, on your way
Up and down, usually the same people you'll meet
Ambitiously you're treating wants as needs, steady losing sleep
[Hook]
Insomnia taking me
Dark thoughts and desires keep waking me
I deal with it everyday, you see
It slows me down, close friends losing faith in me
Can't tell me where I'm going wrong
I'm headstrong, I'll deal with it on my own
Years pass, still up on the same road
Thought I know it all, but never knew I gotta let go
[Verse 2]
Some people fight their own healing process
Running from the darkness they refuse to acknowledge
Staring in the mirror while hating what they see
Because others won't approve, mean words go deep
You've opened up your heart for the very first time
And the reward was a dagger from behind
Was ready to move and put it all on the line
Or so you thought, because commitment wasn't really on his mind
Fear of men setting in after the fact
Offered comfort you refuse out of pride, pushing away
People who love you, in spite of what you put them through
Wondering why they stick around, seeing what is good in you
All they really want for you's to overcome the hurdles
Escape the escapism, you argue it hurts so much
And it does, you want to go back to the person
That you was, be the love you never had instead, or else...
[Hook]
[Verse 3]
I'm no better, lingering resentments towards women
Have hindered me tremendously, when coupled
With conflicting urges, like me questioning my purpose
When and what to invest in whom, for what it's worth
I learned to forgive, drop grudges, and see the beauty
In others, despite my own insecurities, suffering
From the random bouts of depression, I referenced so often
Nevertheless, I make an effort to involve them
In friendship, I'm there for them, despite often feeling lonesome
Learned to accept my flaws, and strive to love wholesome
Harder on myself than necessary in order
To transform into a version of me I never showed one
Full of confidence, yet humility
Loving you regardless if you're long gone or still with me
Speaking my mind with compassion, yet no filter
And revel in everything about me that's off-kilter
But instead I'm writing this...
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7. |
What Is Left
03:47
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[Verse 1]
First breath, then first steps, among the first words
Was a curse, way before I heard my first rap
Fed Ritalin pills, around the time I chucked a size 7
Ball against the board through the net
It is what it is, the fragments remain
Like faces you can't remember as you stand at their graves
How many minutes were spent wondering what if?
How many hours were spent hating the shift?
How many times you got slapped for giving your parents lip?
How many times were they in the wrong and wouldn't admit?
If you can't be just, be arbitrary
And most people are, so wars're never resolved
Worked more jobs than most people had sexual partners
Everywhere it's the same, from corporations to startups
It's all entropy, chisels to the statue
From halcyon days to periods where you're destitute
People try to define things, perception is altered
By events, yet they insist that times change
Do this, wear those, and don't eat that
Love is such is such, criticism and feedback
Bad weather, gun violence, surgical air strikes
Polyamory, drug abuse, there aren't any fair fights
It's so easy to see the patterns
In the face of death, how much of it will even matter?
Maybe the truth is, that during confusion
We spend the only moments of our lives free of delusion?
We don't know who we are, because we're biased
By past actions and thoughts, so tell me what is left
If that's gone? A misguided quest for a sense
Of identity stored past capacity of memory?
Are we truly influenced by karmic energy?
What if death is our last act of charity?
Between faith and heresy, straddling the barrier
Between language and telepathy
The burden of interpreting the words we never speak
Whatever will be left, when the silence will deafen me
All that I've done, failed to do, and never would
All I withheld, they never knew and never could
All the songs, aborted takes, and beer bottles
What is left, if all that's gone tomorrow?
From birth to death, joy and the stress
Compressed, into no and yes, tell me what is left
Worst fail and the biggest success, labeled the best
Then forgotten, tell me what is left?
Love given and love lost
Sound mind, broken heart, tell me what is left?
Distill it down to the essence of what makes you
And then take a look at what is left...
What is left?
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8. |
Contemplation
01:44
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Erik Jackson New Smyrna Beach, Florida
From digging in thrift shops to lecturing in universities. Erik has been producing and DJing since the late 90s. Releasing material through The Pad Pusher Records and a slew of other record labels, Erik’s heady brand of jazzy, (largely) instrumental hip-hop/DnB has been praised by everyone from hardcore underground hip-hop heads, Drum and Bass purists to traditional jazz fans around the globe ... more
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